Phantom Lovers

46
Dr. Henry Blount

Phantom Lovers are phony lovers.
They play the losing game of make-believe.
Unsuspecting people are hurt deep down…
Because he busted a relationship she thought was real?
Or she projected an image he couldn’t possibly live up to.
So there they go, using, abusing,
Manipulating and masquerading.

The twelve year-old cries herself to sleep.
“Mom and Dad don’t love each other any more.
What next? Did I do something wrong?”
No, the fires just burned out, that’s all.
Or maybe, that’s all it was, a little fire
To begin with. Just lines, well memorized
Lines that went nowhere except to someone
Else who swallowed them whole.

But let’s don’t dwell on the “all too common.”
There ARE those who know the real meaning of love.
And it’s the most powerful thing on the planet.
If it calls for sacrifice, then so be it.
Real love holds life together.
When you can love without expecting anything
In return, you are tapping into the heart of the universe.
That’s whet it means to be human.
That’s just who we are. You have to work at being
Phony.

Poet and author, Mark Nepo, tells about a kind, quiet man,
Who would pray in the Ganges River every morning.
One day, he saw a spider struggling in the water
And he cupped his hands to carry it ashore.
The spider stung him.
It happened again and again.
On the third day, there was the spider, legs flaying the water.
As the man lifted the creature yet again,
The spider said: “Why do you keep lifting me?
Can’t you see I will sting you every time,
Because That Is What I Do.
And the kind man cupped his hands around the spider, replying:
Because That Is What I Do. (From the Book of Awakening, p. 21)

It’s in our very nature to lift each other. To love each other unconditionally
Even when we are stung.
Especially when we are stung. That is what we do.
Dogs bark, Cats meow, Trees give shade, Cows give milk
Because that’s what they do. All of us have our purpose.
Our true nature.

“It is the reaching out that is more important than the sting,”
Says Nepo. “I’d rather be fooled than NOT believe.”
Didn’t Jesus say, “Turn the other cheek’? Not easy, for sure.

Those who refuse to lift another, who’d rather cause problems,
Than to help solve them, have strayed away from the Center.
A person is sick who hates, lies and grabs.
His soul is drying up, shrinking, starving, longing to be whole.
Yet…not knowing what he’s longing for.
You can live inside phoniness a life-time.

But the happiest people in the world are those who discover what
God intended them to be.

“God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power and love.” (2 Tim 1:7)

“Everyone who loves is born of God.” (1 John 4:7)